rider profile:

David P

Riding background: When I was fourteen I went thirds with two mates in a Suzuki RM80. None of our parents knew we had it so we used to keep it in an abandoned factory that backed onto Moorabbin Airport. Every time we wanted to ride it we'd to have to lift it out through a broken window. We used to ride it in the paddocks around the airport until the cops came and chased us away. Two years later we blew the motor. Shortly after that, the factory was leased and we never saw the RM again. To this day my Mum still doesn't know anything about it. At age 17 I purchased a Honda XL250 and got my L's at 17 & 9 months. I got my first "Real" road bike (KawasakiGPX750) at age 20, and I've never been without a bike since. In 1998 I bought an XR600 and got back into trail riding. Three years later I upgraded to the KTM and started racing MX for two years. No trophies, but it was heaps of fun.

Favourite ride: Tight & Twisty - Refton Spur, But if you want to separate the men from the boyz, it's the fast open sweepers beyond Jindabyne to Tallangatta.

Current Car:

• Maserati 222E. Does any one have access to a fake licence? I'm going to need one! (Well officer, the reason I was doing 220 was because it was the only way I could overtake nine cars at once).
• Kombi Ute. When I bought it the guy told me a 350 Chev motor would slide straight in? Best feature: VB Dash Mat & 200watt Driving Lights that fry small furry animals!
• Nissan Patrol Tray Back. Yes it's the biggest car in the car park (Does this mean I'm compensating for something)?

Worst accident:

• Damage to property: Reefton Spur, CBR1000, second last corner, Dewy right behind me. Carrying way too much corner speed on a left hander I needed to take a wider line. As I ventured on to the wrong side of the road a car was coming the other way. In a panic, I grabbed a hand full of everything, causing the bike to stand up & head in a straight line off the edge of the road and down a twelve-foot embankment. A treefern broke my fall and I walked away without a scratch. The CBR was badly damaged but still rideable. The problem was getting it back up to the road. It probably didn't help that I was still recovering from the night before.
• Personal Injury: Barrabool MX Track, about to take third place (first time ever) on the last lap when I loose control and fly over the handlebars of the KTM, landing on my wrists. Second race, same scenario, same outcome. Unloading the bike when I got home, I fell off the back of the ute face first. It took eight months for my wrists to heal. I've never had to seek medical attention as a result of a motorcycle related injury, although there have probably been a few occasions where I should have.
• Most embarrassing Accident: Dirty weekend at Heathcote. I was chasing the Neumanator through the bush, when the front wheel washed out on a right hander. I lay right across the track leaving nowhere for quick thinking Dewy to go. So as the true mate he is, he launched the KTM off the back wheel of my disgraced steed parking his front wheel fair square up my ass like a bicycle rack. The nobby tread pattern was still imprinted on my behind weeks later.

If you could have any bike, what would it be: Oh my God I just can't bring myself to say the name, but an NR750 (I told you they're like weeds). First released in the early 90's, it's a V4 with oval pistons effectively giving it the power of a V8. The motor was heavily restricted so it was ridable. There's about 90 examples floating around, two of which reside in Australia. The only problem is I'd actually need three. One to hoon about on, one to keep in a glass case to look at, and one to sacrifice goats too, oh and one for touring. Better make it four!

What is your most prized and important possession: There is no, one thing that comes to mind, but the items that bring me most joy collectively are: Ute, Dirt Bike, Swag, Billy & good company. This is all I need to survive.

What item do you worship the most: Some of you may scoff, but the truth is I'm actually not really materialistic. Despite my comments about the NR (we all have to dream) I'm quite often happiest with just the basics. It's true, some of the best things in life are free...

What is the best thing that has ever happened to you: Joining MMCT. When I look back over the last seventeen years, all the good things that have happened to me have evolved directly or indirectly though the club. Nearly every aspect of my life would be different if it wasn't for the contacts I've made through MMCT. I think of the club as family.

What is the worst thing you have ever done: If it went to print I could still go to jail, seriously! And the second worst I'm too ashamed to admit, so I'll just have to keep you guessing.

Best commercial: Cast your minds back a few years to the Kit Kat commercial where a photographer was waiting for the Giant Panda's at the local zoo to come out of their cave. After waiting days on end in rain hail & shine he turns around to take a break and have a Kit Kat. While his back is turned the Panda's come out on roller skates and perform a dancing duet, skating back into the cave just as the photographer turns around to resume his position, none the wiser. It didn't matter how many times it was shown in one night, it always made me laugh.

Hottest actor: I find it hard to lust over someone I don't know intimately. (Sorry)

If you could choose your parents who would they be and why: Valentino Rossi, & Margo from the British TV series "The Good Life" played by Penelope Keith. Valentino because you'd get to travel the world and your life would evolve around bikes. Dad might even show you a few riding tips so you could one day have a world title too. How cool would that be? Margo. Well just the thought of Margo being married to a world champion GP racer instead of an architect cracks me up. I think that's how the series should have been written in the first place. For a start there wouldn't have been a "Bloody Volvo" parked in the driveway.

If you were given $10,000-00 for plastic surgery what would you have done: I'd put the ten grand down as a 10% deposit on the NR. Because no matter what you look like there will always be someone who'll find you attractive, and if the person you want to attract doesn't feel the same, then they're not worth it anyway!

What do you wear to bed: Depends who I'm sharing with! At home it's always a-la-natural.

When did you come out: It wasn't long after I joined the MMCT. I'd had the worst day ever, and my Mum insisted I come over after work. As soon as I walked in the door she asked me if my "new friends" were gay? Yes. Are you? Gulp! Yes. She seemed so pleased. I just wanted to die. After that I figured it doesn't matter who knows now! As it turned out I never needed to worry about it anyway, as my Mum told everyone I knew and then some! I was 21. She still outs me today!

Teenage crush/idol: I never had a crush as a teenager. (Maybe I was too self obsessed)

Best bike you've owned: I hate to admit it simply because it seems the most obvious choice, but this award would definitely have to go to the 748. Sex on wheels!!! You'd need to own one to truly appreciate one. The 749 is a very close second and probably a better bike to ride, but given what else was around at the time the 748 was released, I believe it still holds its own today.

What do you get out of the MMCT bike club: More demerit points on my licence? See: What is the best thing that has happened to you.